International online dating, like most interactive internet activities, is riddled with scammers, people whose sole purpose in life is to separate you from your money . However, if you follow some pretty simple rules of safety, utilize a first class website that focuses on introducing Chinese women to Western men and goes overboard trying to protect you from the scammers, then simply use some common sense, you can meet Chinese women of a quality you’ve only dreamed of until now. You can focus on locating your Chinese life mate and you won’t have to worry about getting scammed.
The first thing you should do is create a long term goal. Do not get in a rush. You’d be amazed by how many men actually propose to the first Chinese woman they meet online, before they’ve even met her in person. That is insane! Relax, kick back and settle in to really enjoy the fun of online dating and meeting lots of beautiful Asian girls, who, unlike “emancipated” Western women, actually want you, want to be with you, want to take care of you. When is the last time you met a woman who genuinely “wanted to take care of you”? Well on a quality Chinese dating website you have a great chance to meet lots of them.
Your job isn’t to find one Chinese woman who’s willing to marry you as fast as conceivable. Just the opposite, your job is meeting Chinese women in flocks who are looking for a find a western lifemate. Then, out of all those Chinese woman who want to be your lifemate, to weed out the best China lady for you . You can’t do that overnight ! Nor should you, because this step can be a lot of fun .
The plan is as follows:
1. Determine the time that you’re going to travel to China, because eventually you’ll have to do that to meet in person those great China ladies you’ve narrowed your list of real potential lifemates down to. Don’t make the mistake of having them come to you. The cost and stress of hosting 3 to 5 Chinese female guests for several weeks each will be far more than you going to China to meet them, and this way you get a great adventure out of the deal. Plus, if you’re in China you can simply instantly escape any Chinese woman who is not what you were expecting, instead of being stuck entertaining her for the entire time she’s in your country.
I suggest that, finances allowing, you make it between 3 months and 9 months from the date you start your internet dating adventure to the date you arrive in China. Anything less than 3 months is too soon to have met enough women of China and shortlisted the very best of them. Anything longer than 9 months is going to seem like too long to them to wait to finally meet you.
2. Put together a really great profile. Read Dating Tips and articles in your site’s online dating section and eMagazine on this subject. (If your international online dating site doesn’t offer this advice why is it your favorite?) Then take the time to make your profile one that will really catch the eyes of the Chinese ladies.
3. Start searching in earnest through the many thousands of pretty Chinese women that should be available on your Chinese dating website for the ones who are most attractive to you as lifemates . Don’t dwell on the ones who look like they’d hit the hay with you on a moment’s notice, because they probably would – you and about a hundred other guys. Look for sincere Chinese ladies who want a lifemate, not a customer.
4. Make contact. In my opinion your first contact should be only a Kiss even if you’re able to send a full message . You don’t want to seem desperate or over anxious. If she doesn’t respond follow up with a short message several days later. NEVER send a great big long biography of yourself in the first message. You’ll bore her to tears. Keep it short and fun. Make her want to know more .
5. Send out lots of opening kisses, but only to Chinese girls who are of real interest to you. The number of replies you receive will surpise you if you’re on a real quality site, and you don’t need to get bogged down writing letters and chatting with ladies who you knew beforehand were not real match material for you.
6. Once you start communicating with some of the members be careful. As much effort as a quality site extends to eliminate scammers there are always some who get past the barriers and don’t get caught until a member reports them. On that note, the moment anyone asks you for money, no matter how sincere and reasonable it seems, report them to your website’s service department and expect them to enquire and apprise you of their conclusions. If there isn’t a clear and responsible ongoing effort by the website to limit scammers, change websites and find one where there is.
7. Now, plan in hand get out there and meet that beautiful Chinese woman who will make your life complete . After all, Chinese women turn dreams into reality.
John Abbot is co-owner of ChinaLoveMatch.net. Married to a lovely Chinese Lady and living in China, John knows and respects China, Chinese Women, Chinese People and Chinese Culture. He blogs about Online Dating, Chinese Women, International Relationships and Things Chinese.